Monday
Today I discovered that my heart was stillborn
and only beats out of a sense of obligation to my mother.
I found this very insulting.

Tuesday
I was ogled by cats all day. They seem to think
I have a personality. In truth, I am the most naked animal
in the world. I own ten shirts with the word 'spine'
printed on the back. I wear them like I wear my skin.

Wednesday
It is changing. The rain now falls into the sky, and the
ground is dancing. I went to buy pictures of eagles,
but they were all empty. The store clerk did not understand
my disappointment. 'Don't you like this grass?' he asked,
but I told him the cause of his death: a blue Nile. This seemed
to silence him.

At least I saved the money.

Thursday
Will they bury me in the end? I hope that means I will fall
into the universe like a comet. When I was little,
the other children wanted to be firemen, athletes,
lawyers, action heroes, presidents and astronauts;
I always wanted to be a comet. The reason:
I am hopelessly in love with nothing.

Friday
A man came by and watched me through binoculars, I think,
but he was only an arm's length away. I found that
extraordinary. He told me that I should eat diamonds at sunrise,
and I said that his eyes were diamonds. This is a Gentleman's Doom,
I thought, wondering what it meant that his inky eyes were burning.
Come sunrise.
Come sweet sleep.

Saturday
Dear Diary: I have just read my entries since Monday, and I must reluctantly conclude that I have finally gone completely mad. My friends always told me that this was the normal state of things with me, but I know that they did not mean it like this. Poor dears - if they only knew that they were talking to a mere idea of a human, held together by designer chemicals and Lucky Strikes alone. My only real friends are people in white coats. I can feel that the medicine is not holding it back any more.

One of these days, I shall be flying over the cuckoo's nest for sure.

Sunday
I am the only person who has ever managed to write an entire sentence while falling from a fifth-floor window.